state of the union.

it feels like each new week brings monumental changes in my life, these days. it's weird to think of all that is going to be changing in such a short time. new home. new job. new school. new city. new friends. *sigh*

but i'm doing well. this semester, God has chosen to teach me some hard lessons. learn to cling to him as my one and only constant. what does real, authentic, deep love really look like? what kind of person do i want to really be? what kind of life to do i want to truly pursue? things that i've always understood on one level, he has deepened and pushed deep within my soul. there have been tears, laughing, anger, brokenness, frustration. to think of it all is a little overwhelming, but in the end, i can say that he is good. he is faithful. through it all, he's given me a quiet confidence. i think (key word) that i'm getting a glimpse of some things just around the corner, but i've learned to not anticipate it or try and figure things out. to enjoy where i am and deeply trust in where he is leading. i am beginning to remember that deep feeling when i am in the center of his will. sometimes i forget that and try to forge my own path. i get anxious and want to control my path. but through all of the broken dreams and letting go that i have endured over the last 4 years, i can see that he knew best all along. imagine that... so i'm learning to trust him and to look for that inner confidence to hear his voice and follow his guiding. i'm so glad he loves me enough to take away the things that mean the world to me if they will bring me more of him. at times, it's so hard for me to understand, but i'm learning to trust from deep inside that he is faithful.

that's the spiritual things, but here's the rest. i've sent in all my stuff to eastern in philadelphia. just waiting on an answer now. i've most likely found a place in denton to chill out for the summer. i found my dream job in philadelphia.. no worries.. an application will be sent in asap. graduation is right around the corner, and i am pumped about a summer of just working, reading, and enjoying community. i'm grateful for a glimpse, but i'm also learning to truly enjoy the surprises, bumps, and bruises along the way...